Saturday, September 8, 2007

Two of my favorite words put together- disgust me.

Q: What's the difference between a Palmetto Bug and a Cockroach?
A: About $80,000.

When I first moved to The South, I was warned about bugs, specifically this one. There's more of them down here than any of the other states I've lived in and though they are not as much of a nuisance as New Hampshire Black Flies, they will scare the shit out of you when you snap on the light in the garage sending them scurrying from the recycle bin.
I had my share of roaches when I lived in a crude brownstone in Rochester next to the Indian curry lovers and above the Jamaican family, but I learned to keep my eyes shut and the light off in my evening bathroom visits.

After a recent roach invasion from shed and garage to laundry room, for some reason?? I set out traps and discussed
with my son the possible eradication of all insects from our abode.

Me: I wonder what animal eats cockroaches? We could import them and sell them to people, like cats for mice and ladybugs for aphids.
He: What if you could train bugs to fight each other, like at night when you're sleeping.
Me: Like with toothpick swords and bottle cap shields?
He: Yeah, and in the morning there would be little bug corpses everywhere.
Me. Yeah, and they would evolve so that they grew weapons out of their pinchers-
He: -like howitzers and bazookas !
Me: That would blow tiny holes in your feet!
He: Ok. Maybe that wasn't such a good idea.

2 comments:

Family Adventure said...

Ugh. I lived in Costa Rica for a while, and the bugs there were of a size you would not believe. I could tell you stories, but I do not want to freak you out more than you already are. OK, just one: We used to have these weird animals living above the ceiling, underneath the roof. They were slightly bigger than a squirrel, I was told, and totally harmless. All righty, then, I decided not to worry about them, and focus more on the roaches and snakes actually in the house (!)...until one day I noticed water leaking into the kitchen from the ceiling. Thinking we had a leak in the roof, I looked outside, and realized that it was in fact sunny, not rainy. You get the idea... Gross!!

That's one good thing about Norway, there's hardly any bugs here - acc. to my husband nothing can live here but Norwegians and mosquitoes. It is too darn cold and dark :)

Unknown said...

Ha! and, EWWW on the Costa Rica squirrel thing. I think I can handle most bugs, just when I start to think they are an indicator of my cleanliness, I am a bit concerned... snakes might be kinda cool. I used to have a rather LARGE python. I loved CA for its non bugs-- NO MOSQUITOES- ever!
Re: Norway cold and dark- I expect that's coming soon for you, so far pix look sunny and agreeable.