Tuesday, April 1, 2008

I'm turning into my Italian grandmother

This morning I found a pencil tip length -sharpened, mind you- dark hair sprouting from my chin. No, I'm not posting the picture. I said, "Merda!"
A few hours later, I decided a nice waste-err, use of my time would be to iron my linen napkins then leave notes all over the house reminding everyone what they needed to pack for our getaway in 4 days. I don't know about you, but my Grandma was a big planner.

I started to bake but decided to look at porn instead- just kidding!! My darling Italian Granny died before the internet allowed for such interesting entertainment, so see, that is not what I would be doing if I was my grandma, instead I washed my little hairy dog- yes, a real dog-- people get your minds out of the gutter.
And I wrote thank you notes then washed my windows. Now I have to walk down to the mailbox and find someone to brag about my grandchildren to- and make sure they all know that in a few days, I will be laying on a beach just like this one:
getting more wrinkly and loving every minute.

funny old people joke:
An old man and his wife are in church when she leans over to him and whispers, "I just let a silent one go, what should I do?"
He says, " Change the battery in your hearing aid."
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