Tuesday, November 25, 2008

Being spoiled is a good thing. When you're the Mom.

My husband says I'm spoiled. I am. And it's mostly his fault.

He gives me more than I deserve and tells me I've earned it, when I think I am just doing my wife-mother-homeowner job. From expensive clothes and jewelry to a new car and trips away... he is a good good man.
This weekend he took me here, to this suite, to see the Atlanta Falcons kick some Panther ass. Meow.
I say my husband is mostly responsible for spoiling me, because I grew up with three sisters and my parents gave us alot, but let us know what a lot meant, and later, I had boyfriends who spoiled me in their own ways.. usually that meant me getting my way, and them sacrificing their needs before mine.
God, put that way, I do sound spoiled, selfish even.
Let me say, I am grateful for everything I have ever received and like to give in return. My husband and I are alike in that way, and we hope we are raising children who think similarly.

There may be a difference in "spoiling" when it comes to guys and girls. I never really figured out the whole boy thing- which was very confusing when my son was born and I was new to a strange town, living 3500 miles away from family. Those were some long phone calls.
I still think I favor him more than my daughter, because I grew up knowing that the woman has to handle a lot more than the man. The man, he goes to work and does work things. He comes home and has his drink and his dinner and his TV. ( yes, yes, I am exaggerating.. relax)

The woman- she does all the rest.

So, when I tell my son to do all his chores, sure I check on him, but I also give him some slack- not expecting perfection or even great attention to detail. With my daughter, who is four years younger... I come down much harder, asking her if she thinks she's completed her task well or merely good enough. She needs to learn good enough isn't always enough, if you don't have a woman behind- spoiled or not- you picking up the slack.

2 comments:

Churlita said...

I'm kind of the opposite. For eight years when I was a kid I lived in a very sexist Irish Catholic household, where the women basically served the men. I don't want my daughters to settle for that. I don't have sons, but if I did, I think I'd be just as hard on them as I was my daughters because I resented the inequity so much when I was younger.

Anonymous said...

Shoes,
Let me give you my point of view.
There are baby shoes that start you off on your journey and discovery of life.
Then came the cute Mary Janes so sweet with that patent leather shine for your first day of school, not to forget those first prom shoes that you picked out yourself and looked just perfect in as you danced the night away but gave you blisters on your feet.
The most important were the wedding shoes that you later traded in for sneakers being
pregnant and having children to keep up with. The best shoes in life are the ones you wear being a grandmother. They are built for comfort with laces reminding you from the height that they haven’t changed much in style from the first pair of baby shoes that you originally wore. The most important thing is that no matter how many shoes you see in
life nobody can wear them or walk the miles for you.
Albuquerque..