Monday, December 28, 2009

Well, that was fun. Now who's going to put it all away?

My mess  decor is nothing at all like the elaborate multiple arches lights/music/rotating reindeer and Santa in the sleigh yard displays that I saw on TV this past week, as a matter of fact, we put out the least amount of lights ever this year, in the fastest amount of time. It was nice that not once did I blow a fuse while drying my hair. Not once did I have to run out to the garage dripping wet, brace myself behind the refrigerator, contort my arm while holding up a towel and blindly slap the reset switch just to save all that beer from dropping in temperature a single degree.

Inside, it was basically the same, with an upgraded tree skirt and a few new ornaments on the fake tree.
We actually tried to pack up and fly out to Mexico for the week, ( great deals being offered) until the 11 year old got really sad and quiet and we remembered not everyone in the house knew exactly what was coming on the 25th, that not all of us are quite ready to pack up the Santa hat and plate of cookies just yet.

Maybe next year.

 At least when undecorating this year, I have a big beefy teen to climb in the attic and toss down bins and boxes.. help me stash, store and haul all that crap stuff back up there.
And yet

Know this.
If i had another attic, I would have another 5 bins of Christmas decor. I want a life sized manger display, I want a set of carolers, music included, that stand under a flickering streetlamp. I want a giant candycane fence, a corral of reindeer- one with a red nose. I want a rooftop display that spells out Joy to the World. I want an Elvis impersonating Santa blazoned onto my garage door rocking out to Christmas Carols and at least three decorated trees in my house- all themed. I, of course, want to point and control and demand, but not really DO any of the work. I want my own mini Biltmore, A minor Martha moment. I want to be as inumdated with Christmas in my house as Walmart, Macy's and Target were the day after Halloween.
 I want wreaths dropping pine needles and I want hot glue gunned ribbons and bows and matching boxes for everyone stacked in every room of the house, gifts for everyone including the mail lady who I don't particularly even like....
I only want all this if Christmas comes in June.

Because right now, Christmas set up requires a whole month-- the advent calendar starts on the first.. and this is merely a few DAYS after Thanksgiving with its cornucopias and turkeys and pies and autumnal colors and scarecrows and hay bales .. and only a few weeks after the big murder mystery which takes 3 months of prep and plan and set design- which is only one week after the humungous Halloween display with cemetary, giant ghouls and 7 bins of decor inside and out...
 so, truly, it's not that I am not ABLE. It's that- frankly... I am not WILLING. Not so much so soon. I have only so much creative output... on top of writing a novel, and all the other make believe stuff that goes on inside my head. I can't DO Christmas in December.

So, whoever is in charge? Can we move it please? It's just a few months. Imagine how much nicer it will be to climb on a roof when it's 80 degreees not 30? How much more time you'd take to admire the neighbor's display as you walked your dog late at night? How much more you would feel close to the Baby Jesus- who was born in a hot desert - nowhere near the frozen month of December.

C'mon. You feel me, don't you?
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